


In Which Sherlock Gets Punched By John Watson's God Awful Mustache

by GillianSaysRAWR



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Crack, Friendship, Funny, Gen, Mustaches, Season/Series 03, That god damned mustache
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-19
Updated: 2013-11-19
Packaged: 2018-01-02 01:00:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1050639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GillianSaysRAWR/pseuds/GillianSaysRAWR
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The title says it all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Which Sherlock Gets Punched By John Watson's God Awful Mustache

**Author's Note:**

> I found this while going through my computer, based on the series three teaser.

He didn’t know what to expect, even after the ten million times he practiced it. No, that was an overstatement, he practiced it 2,300,018 times. While crouched behind a dumpster, waiting for the man he was trailing to walk by, Sherlock would whisper to himself the exact words he would say to John the moment he was standing in front of Sherlock. These words never changed, not even the speed at which he said them. Slow and precise, the exact opposite of what came out of his mouth as he was deducing a crime scene. 

But when Sherlock Holmes stood in front of John Watson for the first time in three years, his brain seemed to stop. The words didn’t flow from his mouth as he had planned them to, the rehearsed words did not make it to the tip of his tongue. He was mesmerized…mesmerized by that mustache. 

“Hello John.” was all he could manage to get out. His eyes were fixed on that God awful thing sitting upon John’s lip. “John...?”

Sherlock still stared intently at the mustache, wondering why John would think it was a good idea to let it grow there. It did not help one bit with his appearance, in fact, Sherlock thought, it worsened it. “John…?”

Due to the slow pace that his brain was working at, Sherlock failed to notice that John had been getting more furious by the second, and before he could say something else, a blow came to Sherlock’s face. It was cushiony, not like that hard jab of a fist to a jaw, it was a fluffy surprise. Before he fell to the floor, Sherlock deduced that he was, in fact, punched by John Watson’s ugly mustache.

As he came back around, Sherlock wearily opened his eyes, letting them float through out the room. Again, his eyes seemed to settle back in on John Watson’s upper lip.

“I’m glad you’re back.” John said as Sherlock grew fully aware of where he was, laying on the restaurant floor, sprawled out in the middle of two tables.

“I’d be a lot happier to see you if that _thing_ wasn’t on your face.” Sherlock said lightly, but with as much attitude as if he were talking to Anderson.

“Oh, how I’ve missed you.” And with that, John goes back to his table, leaving Sherlock lying on the floor with a massive headache that will take him days to get over. But Sherlock was fine with that, he just wasn’t fine with that damn mustache.

That’s why when Mrs. Hudson woke up the next day she found herself with a very bruised and cut Sherlock Holmes and a mustache-less John Watson fighting in the flat above hers. 

221b never felt more like home.


End file.
